Showing posts with label celebrity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label celebrity. Show all posts

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Mental Hiatus & Work

I am having an unofficial hiatus of sorts...

I am still here, I am just possessing a different kind of head space and taking the opportunity to hone some of my skills.

The Janome is gathering dust - but I have just recently purchased some wildly exciting fabric so perhaps I will be designing and creating on the physical plane shortly. Think Gidget.

For now however I am working on 2D. In love with shiny cars designed within an inch of their own believe-ability scalloped in sensuous chrome I decided to have a crack and illustrating a car. A 1969 Chevrolet Impala to be precise.
Original Image

'Super Grande' Illustration

My boobs and a Coffee...


Boobs...ahh the lost art of language.
Corffee as said by Carmela Sporano

"Tony you wanna corffee?

I have plans for more and more...
have a happy week folks!


Thursday, September 13, 2012

Why I Admire People Who QUIT!

I am a trier and a striver in many ways. Always trying new things and striving to make things better. I am also a sticker - I stick by people and things.

Now that all might sound good right?

Its not good.

I think its my perception of being 'good' and 'reliable' and 'strong'. Sometimes (often) it hasn't served me. I will be there smiling and dying on the inside, my clenched brushed teeth like a little shield that belies the 'I am dying in here' mental tract I am stemming from exploding into the atmosphere verbally. I suppose in the past I could be accused of manacling and muzzling myself for the greater good of others...yes that statement could be quite fair.

Recently - very recently I decided I was going to give up. Quit. Let go of, send it off into the funeral pyre of failures. Oh I tried, I truly tied and the feedback was I was actually quite good at it but inside...sad grey limp me.


I don't give up on things easily like I said I commit to things - morally. My friendships; I am the stayer, the stalwart, the through thick or thin pin. My head says I will make things work. I can be irritatingly determined. Taking things on I carefully consider it all, I take a task and pick it up and examine it from every angle, I play out the what ifs in my head, I am careful, deliberate, conscious.

Then there are those other types, the people I have met that appear to have done the same then enter into it and go...

'You know what...actually...no'

I how I have grown to admire these people, they are 10 foot tall in my estimation.

Previously I was like a dog with a bone, I would gnaw on things, toss the problem around, see if I could make it into something new, something rewarding, a karmic challenge, an blessing disguised as an issue.

Yesterday I said...

No its an ugly bone, I have tasted and tested it, there is no meat, no nourishment for me. I am not the happy dog chewing on that bone and I don't want to soon behave like the dog that's poorly fed unsatisfied and mean.

So I simply said...yes after anguish and much self flagellation I said no more to that bone and I gave up. Looking myself squarely in the eye...I hee hawed loudly, barked, waged every imaginable tail and...
 I said no more, I said that's not for me!



Thursday, June 14, 2012

::: EVERYBODY WANTS TO FEEL IT :::

Everybody wants to feel...

pretty basic statement.

Sure we all know it is truth but feel - feel what exactly?

Sometimes we think we know what we want to feel and how to get that for ourselves but when it sneaks up on us and hits the spot - Amen! Strange creatures humans all wanting to deny the fact that we are indeed cliches. Self aware bots wearing our emotional amour we savvy our way through each day.

Right now as I type some music has started playing that's perfectly bluesy and the sky is grey as the sun sets on this cold Melbourne day, it feels perfect! Yes its one of those exact moments. So I am a cliche but god it feels good.

Meeting people that connect and feel with us is magical. Sharing an interest or taste, music, food some idiotic and obscure 'like' that you may have is so rewarding. I have friends and family that share a rapport that can fundamentally 'put me back together'. Its not that I am emotionally unfolding at every turn but sometimes its like an itch that requires attention. Someone to make you laugh or say that it is okay. Its that someone or thing that re assembles the misaligned within. That said it can also be a song, a place, a type of weather, a hug, a smell, an image, an event we experience and its all okay again. We let our guard down remove our cynical filters and feel good again! We are moved, it strikes a chord and we relax and let something good in.

Tarred With the Same Brush
Nature too does a stellar job at it.
For me the best time to run is when the weather is about to turn, the wind is squally the sky is threatening. For some reason I find it exhilarating, some light rain on the face the bracing cold, trying to outrun the down pour. Then getting in to feel safe and warm sheltered from the storm or rain when it hits is something I love to feel.

Artists make us feel. Putting their grey matter out there on the line their emotions and selves its all laid bare. There is a bravery that creative people exhibit that is truly unique. Many a brilliant talent is never shared due to a type of cowardice or humility. No one welcomes a cutting comment or judgment but trying to avoid it by playing small just sells us all short.

To stick your neck out and expose a part of your brain leaves one wide open for all manner of onslaught. I am a hideously sensitive person - idiotically so. While I continue to work on that flaw I leave myself wide open by putting my personal work out there flaws and all. So when I see anothers work that resonates deep within me I appreciate the emotional risk and vulnerability involved.

Feelings and what triggers them is purely subjective as is the experience of categorising them. I have had moments of exquisite pain (although I am also trying to eliminate that too), embraced angst and willingly let myself be immersed in the misery of a song for instance. I call that doing a sad.
Massive Sad

Finding a vehicle that can exult us, make us cry tears of gratitude, sing, dance, stun, arrest is what I want to feel. There is nothing like that genuine core feeling, often it is a reaction.

So I want to recognise and thank the songwriters, composers and musicians that make my innards reel, the photographers, artists and film makers, comedians, actors, performers that have helped define my take on life, the designers of this world, the architects, the fashion designers, those that design, the animators, the speakers and the writers, the people that live with attitude and to those brave people that wear their heart on their sleeve...

Thank you for your bravery. Thank you for the reveal. Thank you for letting me feel. Thank you for putting me back together.