Showing posts with label woman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label woman. Show all posts

Sunday, January 20, 2013

The Whore, the Slut, the Moll and a Feminist Meet.

Words are interesting and often compelling. I have a genuine fascination with language.

I love the cross over and links in language and the true definitions of words. Many these days have become bastardised versions of their former meaning.

bastardisedpast participle, past tense of bas·tard·ize (Verb)


  1. Corrupt or debase (something such as a language or art form).
  2. Declare (someone) illegitimate: "to annul the marriage and bastardize the child".
We have lost the fluency in a lot of our languages and the cross pollination of peoples and their languages often requires the ad libbed short cut or relaxation of formal verbal/written structure. All is forgiven in the name of the cause - swift not exacting communication.

Often I want to use the term retardation in its truest literal form. My definition of the word would be an early cessation of growth or stiffing of development.

retard [rɪˈtɑːd]vb

(tr) to delay or slow down (the progress, speed, or development) of (something)
[from Old French retarder, from Latin retardāre, from re- + tardāre to make slow, from tardus sluggish; see tardy]
re·tard 1 

To cause to move or proceed slowly; delay or impede.
v.intr.
To be delayed.
n.
1. A slowing down or hindering of progress; a delay.
2. Music A slackening of tempo.

re·tard 2  
n. Offensive Slang
1. Used as a disparaging term for a mentally retarded person.
2. A person considered to be foolish or socially inept.

Which brings me to my title.
What is a whore, a slut, a moll or a feminist for that matter? Is each slur different and why are there so many derogatory monikers like that that are specifically female? Unless specifically tweaked each of the words are assumed to be in relation to a female.

I will refrain from any academic definitions and will instead give my own perceptions of the following... nouns? Verbs? Ahem I shall continue.

Whore 

What is a whore, who is a whore and what does she do? I think...
She is paid she is the worker or the hooker, the paid sex worker, she is not naive nor is she a loser. People resent the whore. Men love and hate the whore. Women often resent and don't get the whore and sometimes hate the whore. Whores are in a dangerous and threatening world, whores know and get the world, sex and carnal desire, they believe in a fair trade, they offer a service. Men and women sometime resent the trade. The fear is the whore is not actually stupid, the fear is the whore plays the game and often wins.

 

Slut

The slut is the good time girl. The slut can be used, abused and spat out - everyone knows what she is. Woman hate the slut, men secretly applaud her. The slut loves the quick mindless visceral satisfaction despite the emotional bruises and bumps, she'll take the ride aware of the potential scrapes and grazes. She is the 'take it now' realise later what she's gotten into. Often the slut wants to find the good guy. Shes just not afraid to try.



Moll

Moll is more a specifically Australian slang. If you are a Moll its not good. The mole is not clever, she is an almost bumbling partaker of casual sex, if she says no it could be misconstrued as rude. The moll is not smart nor is she clean. Men are almost ashamed to admit they have had sex with the moll. Sometimes the moll isn't a bad person but she can really stuff things up for everyone. The moll will get pregnant again and again, hurt every time, she wears her heart and her sex on her sleeve for everyone to see.

 

The Feminist

Now I can only speak personally about this topic and will only do so briefly, I am sure I have stood on enough toes as it is.  For me being a feminist is feeling unbound by a stereotypical limiting notion of being a woman. It is about freedom and not being afraid to voice my opinion.

We define our own words, craft own own language, acquire a vocabulary unique to ourselves. Distinct and defining the words we use are a beacon to the world.

I do occasionally use the above words only in reference to myself in a self disparaging humorous way diffusing the negative connotations. I mean no ones afraid of an 'old moll' the words are no more offensive or hurtful than we allow them to be.

Profanity is often used lightly in Australian language  but be warned, the initiated my fall flat of the mark and cross some very invisible cultural line, its a totally grey area and can cause great offense.

I want to understand what people mean when they say what they say. Am I a retard, a bit of a cheeky tart, should I be upset if someone shouts 'stupid slut' at me in traffic? Provided I am driving correctly not really. But may I say name calling is the lowest form of communication and largely means NOTHING at all,  it is not an effective use of language and becomes a vacuous noise that prevents us from saying what we actually feel.

Why don't we try and say what we really mean and speak from the heart, why don't we think about what we say just a little bit more? I am sure we have all had words burn into our cerebellum that cant be removed and not often are they praise. One harsh word can stick for decades.

It is always better to think about what we say, I know I am stating the obvious. I have thought about all of this before, I have discussed this, these specific words before, their definitions and perceived meaning with friends and colleagues, examined what it is we each mean by saying them. One word can pack quite a punch - be careful what you swing at someone. Personally I try to speak well, be positive and say what I mean and mean what I say...

that's my language of choice.

 

Friday, July 8, 2011

CHANGE vs FEELING SHORT CHANGED

Change vs feeling short changed...lets start with change, the changes that occur as a result of simply being human, human development takes place largely unbeknown to the individual during life's early stages. A child learns to reach, sit up crawl, walk and speak within the first 2 years of its life although for the most part the individual is completely unaware of the giant progression and leaps taken forward in this nubile stage. The childhood years and teen years are full of milestones we are all aware of from reading and writing to physicality and rights of passage, running races, ticking off each school year and phase - again all vast and broad changes and stages of development mark these years although during this time we are much more aware.

Change in adulthood...I always touted myself or thought as myself as an individual who embraced and welcomed change, and for the most part I have even when the cards did not play out as anticipated I brightly took on what I was dealt good bad or indifferent. Now people I am by no ways a fatalist I am definitely a determinist which leads me to the resistance I am feeling in changing at present, or dually present frustration at not changing fast enough.

Being aware of change, initiating it, pushing for it is all fine and good but sometimes life and our brains are resistant - thus the rub...a comfortable rut.

So what leads us to true change, even minute?
Feeling short changed : That discomfort the grit, either it gets the better of you or you use it for impetus to change. I have personally witnessed individuals that have let a knock back or knock on their tail mar them permanently. 'It was all good till'...'If only it had have gone my way'...etc. Just as I have known persons with mammoth burdens and life challenges to have great bright spirits and get on all the same. So what about us mere mortals with only the self to instigate the change either we get comfortable in the discomfort and have an unhealthy relationship with  the resentment it builds within or we action the desired change. Behavior is so clear and easy to speak of until the heart and mind meet bringing us to emotion.
The 'rub' needs to be of enough discomfort or the change is rewarding so that we move towards it without resistance, so why when this is true do we sometimes waste time and rob ourselves, short changing ourselves of the benefits of positive change? I think its the rut, the hammy wheel, the wind is breezing through our little hamster feet and we feel we are moving, such effort, around and around, stepping of requires a wee leap of faith, but I imagine the hamster me landing then rolling and and writhing the spine back and forth like a dog face up on the lawn, then perhaps some bounding, tongue lagging out the side of the mouth happily panting after it, so I am morphing from hamster to dog - stick with me.

I have certainly had enough 'rub and grit' to require change so I will continue to embrace change and sometimes have to accept its sluggish rate.

This portrait of me taken by a talented friend - its more about reach, the pose, the tentative balance, the metal stretch. Perhaps this is required so we do not short change ourselves.

I will bend over backwards for myself like I used to for others and I will make the changes for me...so I can better embrace life. Amen.