Jealosy and the Truth

I once read that jealousy can be a very insightful tool. It is a sign. I believe this to be true.

It shows you what you want - from the gut.

No filter...its unpleasant...

like the urge to be sick,

no one wants it.

But...

it does happen from time to time so why not take this unpalatable human reflex and examine it until it becomes useful.

We all like to think it doesn't happen to us we are enlightened and aligned enough with our own wants and desires that it wont occur within us. We are enlightened beings - this written by me the woman who just saw someone with a better bob than mine, at the supermarket of all places. We snuck glances back and forth through out the entire fruit and vegetable department. Truth is she won - meh hair just wasn't on the top of my priority list today, besides she was naturally olive I cant compete with that and perfect hair.

What makes you jealous?

There are so many things I can say that I am not envious of, I applaud others successes and endeavors, usually they have earned it.

I am talking the kind of afront to yourself that's like a slap in the face, one you didn't see coming. Showing you what you chose not to pay attention to.

They are the telling emotions we should stop and listen to.
Perhaps they are instincts screaming something at you.

Don't dismiss it, listen to it.

Its as unpleasant as rising bile but my my it surely is valuable.

Next time when it happens listen it just might be your gut connecting to your brain shouting listen to me!

Confirming Your Reality

I have been thinking...



you gather people around you to confirm your version of reality.

Some people I know chose their family to do this with - they surround themselves with family as their vision and values are aligned with their own. Their reference points and perspective are similar enough to breed healthy relationships within those parameters.

Then there are friends and associates we may chose to mesh with and they can exist on may levels these days. Online, work colleague, someone you might follow - their career or work, what ever it may be the viewpoint they have may correspond more closely to your own than your god given associates.

Growing up in a place that doesn't offer you enough is a challenge, you can make it work, you can get past it but it takes resilience and true resourcefulness. You pull it up from your insides. You create it.

I have two children I have given birth to and it still truly astounds me that with some help I made the bones, hair, teeth, skin tissue, the gums and eyes they have. Seriously its perplexing.

Surviving a place or mindset where you cannot thrive takes a more spiritual intellectual version of that. I do believe some elements are the same, you manifest matter and hope from the aether, internal development happens despite the baron array.  Character is forged most of it unseen. 

So...

as I said,

you gather people around you to confirm your version of reality.

Or put another way is 'Show me your friends and I will show you who you are'

My friends and the people I chose to affiliate myself with are perhaps reflections of me, they are people I admire, be they flawed or not, be they popular or not, be they perceived as the norm or not.

I have few friends, I truly love my friends - and my family I might say.

My family confirms what created me.

My kind beautiful optimistic helpful divine friends, my slightly dysfunctional very human lovable friends, my serious and light hearted, my impossibly talented, funny, clever friends, my spiritual and grounded, my old and my new friends, my close and my far.

They confirm my version of reality.

My friends my family I love them all,

and I continue on...

and look for more reality to confirm.

A Comment from the incredible Architect Frank Gehry.